Wednesday, 25 April 2012

You can't be disabled because...

We are keen to break up the monologues version of the play with interludes, so we're putting out random questions on twitter and facebook. This one resulted in a phenomenal number of replies & they're still coming in. Lots of black humour, but also lots to enrage us. Thanks to all who participated, here are the answers to:

You can’t be disabled because…
First they came for the disabled.
We can't see PTSD and we've never heard of a hippocampus.
You do not meet my limited definition of being disabled
You drive an Audi. How would you afford it? It would be too difficult for a disabled person to get in.
You can text a friend
You fell for that old chestnut of attending this interview?
You can tweet
You watch TV and soaps and can sit comfortably for half an hour
The reflex test says so. Erm, reflex corresponding to ruptured disc is lower down, you professional, you
You've brushed your hair and you're wearing a nice coat
You can still stick two fingers up at WCAs 
'I saw you stand up!'
You're too young
You can pick up a £1 coin
"You seem alright to me"
"You're smiling"
You look butch. Can't be anything wrong with you.
You could fill in the form
The govt wants all your money simples
You answered questions that was asked
You travelled by bus
You don’t soil yourself every day.
You’re still breathing
You can spell your name backwards
You hold eye contact
You got dressed this morning.
You don’t look disabled enough to me
You brushed your teeth this morning.
You can deadlift 250lbs comfortably... doesn't mean the base of my spine isn't worn away. I can touch my toes too, same deal.
You’re faking it.
You can’t have PTSD because "you've never been in a war zone"
You're not a dribbling, disheveled lunatic howling at the moon and threatening to axe people to death
You’re at university.
You have a girl friend.
You don’t look autistic
You can talk
I cannot see anything wrong with you
You moved your leg.
You can lift an empty box up to waist height.
You’re so pretty.
You can’t be disabled because of Tory ideology.


  1. Yeah but you're not "disabled" disabled.

    (Said in the same style as "but it wasn't 'rape' rape.")

  2. The woman up the road had it and she's all right.

  3. I am surprised to see you here. why did they call you in? this was said to me(i live down south) and i read that they said it to some one in Scotland too.

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