Sunday, 2 December 2012

The Atos Christmas Carol Song Sheet

Tomorrow is International Day of the Disabled. Coincidentally the day that the government has chosen to make workfare mandatory for  people in the Work Related Activity Group. We imagine a few people will be wanting to protest about that. And we thought some Atos Christmas Carols might help keep everyone warm...


1. The first day of Christmas

The first day of Christmas,
Atos Healthcare stripped from me…
My sense of pride and my dignity

On the second day of Christmas,
Atos Healthcare stripped from me…
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity

On the third day of Christmas
Atos Healthcare stripped from me…
Three taxi fares
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity

On the fourth day of Christmas
Atos Healthcare stripped from me…
Four shopping trips
Three taxi fares
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity

On the fifth day of Christmas
Atos Healthcare stripped from me…
Five heating bills
Four shopping trips
Three taxi fares
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity

On the sixth day of Christmas,
Atos Healthcare stripped from me
Six steaming showers
Five heating bills
Four shopping trips
Three taxi fares
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity


On the seventh day of Christmas,
Atos Healthcare stripped from me… 
Eight
Seven Christmas pressies
Six steaming showers
Five heating bills
Four shopping trips
Three taxi fares
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity


On the eighth day of Christmas,
Atos Healthcare stripped from me
Eight cups of coffee
Seven Christmas pressies
Six steaming showers
Five heating bills
Four shopping trips
Three taxi fares
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity

On the ninth day of Christmas,
Atos Healthcare stripped from me… 
Nine nights of Strictly
Eight cups of coffee
Seven Christmas pressies
Six steaming showers
Five heating bills
Four shopping trips
Three taxi fares
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity

On the tenth day of Christmas,
Atos Healthcare stripped from me… 
Ten lights alighting
Nine nights of Strictly
Eight cups of coffee
Seven Christmas pressies
Six steaming showers
Five heating bills
Four shopping trips
Three taxi fares
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity

On the eleventh day of Christmas,
Atos Healthcare stripped from me… 
Eleven pints of milk
Ten lights alighting
Nine nights of Strictly
Eight cups of coffee
Seven Christmas pressies
Six steaming showers
Five heating bills
Four shopping trips
Three taxi fares
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity


On the twelfth day of Christmas,
Atos Healthcare stripped from me… 
Twelve decent meals
Eleven pints of milk
Ten lights alighting
Nine nights of Strictly
Eight cups of coffee
Seven Christmas pressies
Six steaming showers
Five heating bills
Four shopping trips
Three taxi fares
Two toilet rolls
My sense of pride and my dignity


2. Good King Atos

Good King Atos he looked out
On the feast of Stephen
When the snow lay round about
Deep and crisp and even
Brightly shone the moon that night
Though the frost was cruel
When a poor man came in sight
struggling with his fuel



"Hither, page, and stand by me
If thou know'st it, telling
Yonder claimant, who is he?
Where and what his dwelling?"
"Sire, he lives a good league hence
Underneath the mountain
Right against the forest fence
By Saint Agnes' fountain."

"Bring my laptop, bring my pens
Tell him to come hither
Thou and I will question him
When we bear him thither."
Page and monarch went upstairs
Up they went together
Ignoring  claimant’s wild lament
And the bitter weather

"Sire, the stairs are too steep now
I can go no longer
Fails my heart, I know not how,
I wish that I was  stronger."
"My laptop tells me different son.
No points means you are fit now
So go and get yourself a job
Quick get on with it now”

So the claimant left the house
Too tired to make a protest
Weak and ill and failing fast
he lay in the snow to rest
Therefore, Christian men, be sure
Wealth or rank possessing
Ye who do not bless the poor
Won’t yourselves find blessing 


3. The First Nowell

The First Nowell

The First Nowell, Atos Healthcare did say
To certain poor claimants in beds where they lay
Their legs where they lay, too painful  to sleep
On a cold winter’s night that was so deep 
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’ve done our assessment & now you are well
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’re fit for work now so go out and sell

They looked up and saw a star
Shining in the East beyond them far
And to the earth  it shone a great light 
On so many jobs it was quite a sight
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’ve done our assessment & now you are well
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’re fit for work now so go out and sell

And by the light of that same star
Three Wise men came from workplaces far
To get work fare slaves was their intent
So they followed that star whereever it went
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’ve done our assessment & now you are well
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’re fit for work now so go out and sell


The star drew nigh to the northwest
O'er the DWP it took its rest
And there it did both pause and stay
Right o'er the place where IDS lay
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’ve done our assessment & now you are well
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’re fit for work now so go out and sell


Then entered in those Wise men three
Full reverently upon their knee
And offered to his gov-ern-ment
Places to work without payment
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’ve done our assessment & now you are well
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’re fit for work now so go out and sell

Then let us all with one accord
Sing praises to our Heavenly Lord
That hath made health and wealth of nought
And with their blood, disabled people has bought
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’ve done our assessment & now you are well
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
You’re fit for work now so go out and sell

4. God Rest ye Merry Gentleman




God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen,
let nothing ye dismay,
For Atos your good saviour
will take your pains away,
And force you down to Tesco
To work till Christmas Day

Oh Tidings of Comfort and Joy, Comfort and Joy
Oh Tidings of Comfort and Joy.

"Fear not then" said his Angel
"Let nothing you affright.
This day is born a Saviour
Who'll make your life all right
To free all those who trust in Him
From Welfare's power and might

Oh Tidings of Comfort and Joy, Comfort and Joy
Oh Tidings of Comfort and Joy.

Now to the Lord sing praises,
All you within this place,
And with true love and brotherhood
Each other now embrace
This holy tide of welfare free;
All other does embrace


Oh Tidings of Comfort and Joy, Comfort and Joy
Oh Tidings of Comfort and Joy.

(with thanks to the Atos Miracles FB guys)


No comments:

Post a comment